How do we care for our relationships?
As a spiritual director I have been trained in sacred listening – the kind of non-judgmental, caring, accepting, no fixing way of listening that creates an environment for speaking from the heart. When people share from their heart, the truth of who they are emerges. This picture captures the deep nourishing engagement of two people in a private conversation, sharing about something that matters in their lives.
Relating to each other from the truth of who we are nurtures an authentic relationship at the deepest levels of our being – a sacred connection. Relationships benefit from those sacred connections that engage the heart.
How It Works
Make time for private conversation
- Map out time on your calendar to be with the people you care about
- Record them as appointments using a different color pen or a unique symbol to catch your attention and stir your heart with anticipation
- Schedule your other commitments around those appointments
- Show up and savor your precious time together – connecting heart to heart
Sacred connections begin with deep listening
- Be attentive, listen without interrupting
- Be curious, ask questions for clarification
- Be empathetic, acknowledge the emotions being expressed
- Be encouraging, summarize what you heard, then wait for the person to continue
There’s more: Listen with an open heart
- Accept each person as they are, appreciate their idiosyncrasies or unique perspectives as part of their “one of a kind” individuality
- Trust in their wisdom to find their own answers, knowing your answers are not the right answers
- Care more about them than about fixing them
- Make it safe for them to share – keep their story confidential
Meaningful relationships nourish your soul. By making time to engage in deep listening with the people that matter in your life, you are tending to those sacred connections.
For reflection questions on your experience of tending to your relationships, read Relationships Need Tending in my Wisdom of the Feminine – Resources for Women’s Circles blog.
Share Your Story
Who are the people in your life that listen deeply to you? Who are the people you listen to with an open heart? Share your comments in the section provided. Follow this blog to receive each post in your email.
Teresa Lampmann completed a certificate program in women’s spirituality in 1998 and two certificate programs in spiritual direction, one in 1997 and recently in 2015.
Her book, The ABC Path toward True Wisdom, offers stories, reflections, and personal rituals to engage you in trusting your heart for the truth about what matters most in your life.
For a private spiritual direction session.